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Vince Vitrano: Not For Broadcast

JOE VITRANO IS OUT

EARLIEST EVER DECLARATION

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I'm guessing most people don't become more patient later in life, and that is certainly the case with my father and our beloved Milwaukee Brewers.

I received the following email from Joe Vitrano today:

SUBJECT: Brewers

I'm OUT!!!!!!!

DAD

This is not the first time my father has checked out of the season before it's completion. I believe it is, by far, the earliest. Six games in... April 13... Joe Vitrano is "OUT" with seven exclamation points.

I'm not ready to leave yet... not by a long shot. But I don't blame the guy. Like I said, you lose patience; you don't gain it.

The problem is what we've seen from our Milwaukee Brewers so far is following the script so many fans predicted. The bright spots are every bit as good as we'd hoped. The trouble spots are every bit as bad as we feared. Maybe worse.

PROS (and again... it's early)

*Offense has been productive.

*Yovanni Gallardo picked up where he left off.

*Dave Bush is a respectable 3 or 4 guy (and I like him higher).

*Ricky Weeks appears to have improved defensively and has been quite good in the lead-off spot.

*Pleasantly surprised by Braden Looper's first outing.

CONS (and again... it's early)

*Bill Hall had eye surgery and now can see the ball hitting the catcher's mit much clearer.

*Our closer is hurt.

*Our pretend closer can't close.

*Manny Parra can't get out of the 4th inning.

*Jeff Suppan can't get out of the 4th inning.

*Our middle relief can't get us much further.

Soup... say it ain't so. I mean, the guy by most accounts is a decent man, and works hard. Still, that's not going to win any ballgames for the Milwaukee Brewers, and that's what I need dude for. The guy is making more than 12 million dollars this year! 12 Million Dollars!

I don't know why Ken Macha left the dude in so long. I mean, after you load the bases and then walk a run in... isn't it time to go? I guess if you're Macha, and you know the bullpen isn't any better, you keep the dude out there and cross your fingers.

Here's the dialog that should have ensued on the mound:

MACHA: Well, Jeff?

SOUP: Sorry Skip. Just don't have it tonight.

MACHA: You don't say? That makes two starts in a row. Three if you count your horrible performance in Game 4 last year. Pretty ugly.

SOUP: We'll get 'em next time.

MACHA: Might not be a next time.

SOUP: Are you benching me?

MACHA: To the contrary. You're staying out here until the game ends or your arm falls off. I've got nowhere to be. You're pitching 9 innings, or, like I said, no arm. Way I see it, most guys in the stands would cut their arm off for 12.7 million dollars, and that's what you're making this year. So... finish the game... lose a limb... whichever comes first, but it's the last you'll hear from me tonight. Go get 'em.

Oh, also Saturday night, we got hozed on some calls. Rivera had the out at second on that steal, and Rickie did turn that other double play. Despite all this garbage, we should still be 3-3.

Go Brewers!

emails: vvitrano@todaystmj4.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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