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Vince Vitrano: Not For Broadcast

NO EMAIL IN STAR WARS?

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I think I just ruined Star Wars for myself. One recent epiphany has blown the entire plot of Episode IV.

So the whole thing that gets Luke Skywalker sucked into the rebellion in the first place is the need to join Obi Wan Kenobi and help him deliver R2 D2 to the rebel base. Remember, R2 has the stolen plans to the Death Star.

You mean to tell me these geniuses in "a galaxy far, far away" have the technology to travel at light speed, but they can't get a PDF file to the rebel commander on Alderaan or Daantoine or Yavin or wherever they were hanging out?

RE: Secret Plans

ATTACH: DEATH STAR PDF

Dear General Dodanna,

A bunch of of our guys got laser blasted (LOL), but we managed to download the plans in time.

Can you believe it? I did it all on my iPhone! This thing is great. I'm getting 4G even here at the furthest reaches of the galaxy!

Anyway, please see the attached file. Then download the "Death-Star" app on your iPad II, and hit "sync."

You should be good. Let me know if you need anything else. BTW, Darth Vader is about to take me captive, so if you could send someone to rescue me, that would be great. TTYL.

Long live the Alliance!

Princess Leia

 

 

 

 

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